Here comes Santa Claus, here comes Santa Claus, right down Communist lane.  I hate to break it to all the kiddies out there but this is tragic news, for years families world wide in capitalist societies have been praising Santa and spreading his message of holiday joy worldwide.  Christmas seems to be the one time a year where everything wrong in the world tends to disappear for a day and everyone on Earth takes a step back to focus on what’s most important.  Ah but not so fast, it seems lost in all the propaganda of capitalism is the most obvious of all Christmas scandals, Santa is a Communist who has brainwashed everyone and is bent on world domination.

I know what you’re all thinking, “Ok Walks, stretching things a little…maybe a tad desperate for attention to your unpopular website? “, OK you got me, YES I am. But the facts dont lie, this story follows down the same path as a once beloved hero in Super Mario, after all his case of being a Communist is blown wide open. Let’s face facts shall we?

The color red. The trademark colors of Santa are red with a slight touch of white, and red as anyone should know is the color of communism. First organized in 1918 by the Bolsheviks to fight the Civil war, it evolved into the army for the Soviet Union after the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics, the USSR was established in 1922. From the 1940s until the collapse of the Soviet Union in 1991, it was the largest army in the world. They adorned the color Red so as to symbolize the blood shed by the working class in its struggle against capitalism. If Santa inst a commy then why is he dressed in the color of communism?

He’s making a list and checking it twice.  Sounds a little eerie doesn’t it?  Throughout the year Santa keeps tabs on all the children to find out who is naughty and who is nice,  making sure they fall into ideological line.  Back on December 20th, 1917 (5 days before Christmas) a man known as Felix Edmundovich Dzerzhinsky established the Cheka, the first Soviet secret police organization.  Eventually it would evolve into the Komitet Gosudarstvennoy Besopasnosti, better known to us as the KGB.  The role of the KGB was to suppress anyone’s opinion and/or behavior that was deemed unorthodox, furthermore those that were seen as not falling into the right ideological line were monitored by the organization and dealt with accordingly.  Overseeing all this from his KGB Desk Santa has played in the lives of all the young children world wide with his “Santa Claus is Coming to Town”…

You better watch out

You better not cry

Better not pout

I’m telling you why

Santa Claus is coming to town!

He’s making a list

And checking it twice;

Gonna find out Who’s naughty and nice

Santa Claus is coming to town!

He sees you when you’re sleeping

He knows when you’re awake

He knows if you’ve been bad or good

So be good for goodness sake!

Oh! You better watch out!

You better not cry

Better not pout

I’m telling you why

Santa Claus is coming to town!

Santa Claus is coming to town!

Santa not only knows the littlest details about the worlds children, he is blacklisting them on his list tracking everyone’s ideological learning’s.

Communism is a theoretical and practical concept that promotes establishment of a classless, stateless society based on common ownership of the means of production. I could be wrong but Santa’s gift giving worldwide sounds vaguely familiar to the Communist concept, to spread wealth and make all equal.

Hmm, what else?

All great Communists had a beard, so does Santa

Did you know Rudolph is a Russian name?

The elves make all of his presents, all whom are treated equal and under Santa’s slave labor.

Finally who can forget Santa’s trademark “Ho Ho Ho”, seems harmless right?  Wrong!  In actuality its a reference to a Communist icon. Ho Chi Minh devoted his life to the revolution and cause of communism.  Ho journeyed in 1923 to the U.S.S.R. to study Marxism and revolutionary techniques. In Moscow Ho became a member of the Comintern’s Southeast Asia Bureau. In 1924 he moved as an agent of the Comintern to Canton, China, where he helped to organize the revolutionary forces and lectured on politics and ideology. Ho resigned from his position as the party’s secretary-general in 1959. Due to his poor health, his role was largely ceremonial, as the symbol of Vietnamese communism.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YhyfUmCDyG8]

See?  Santa is actually a Commie!

Oh and Merry Christmas

Walks
www.hotstickybun.com